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Journey of the heart

With daughter’s lead, mom learns to embrace multicultural future

A friend and I were recently talking about my daughter’s experiences in Mexico, when he referred to me as "white sandwich bread."

Thinking about it, and coming from rural Ohio, I had to admit that the view of Mexicans I grew up with was gleaned from Clint Eastwood Westerns: they were bandits, lazy, and always drinking. Basically, like the TV shows of my time portrayed them. How was I to know anything else? Of 400 students in my high school, there was one African American and nobody with a Hispanic name.

That view changed when I moved to Tucson. It was a culture shock. Being raised in a place where a foreign language was rarely heard, I just stood in a mall and stared at all these people speaking Spanish. "Don’t they know they are in the United States?" I thought to myself.

When I had my two daughters, Casandra and Catrina, Catrina’s first babysitter was a Spanish-speaking mom. We called her Mama Magaña. I had some of her children in my class. I don’t know if she was legal or not. Her husband worked in the construction industry, and they owned property here. In those days it was not an issue as it seems to be today.

My own feelings about illegal immigration are that I believe we have a lot of illegal immigrants here from Mexico. I truly believe that for those who have been here, working and contributing to our society, something needs to be done for them not to be sent back. I do believe we need laws to control immigration. I don’t believe a wall will control it. And I don’t like putting the military on the border.

A CULTURAL LESSON

Come to think of it, I think that maybe my daughter, Catrina, got her talent for Spanish from listening to Mama Magaña as a baby. Catrina has light skin, green eyes and "dirty" blonde hair. She took bilingual classes through elementary, and studied Spanish in middle, and high school.

She spent her last year in college (2004-05) attending Tec de Monterrey in Cuernavaca, Mexico. Catrina is an independent and strong-willed young woman. She had traveled to Costa Rica on her own, so I wasn’t too surprised that she wanted to live in Mexico awhile.

Then I got a phone call. Catrina was talking excitedly about this young Mexican she had met and that they were going out. At that moment I realized I might one day become the mother-in-law of someone not American. What I mean by that is my image of an American is what I grew up with: a W.A.S.P. (White, Anglo-Saxon Protestant).

I went to visit her in November 2004 and was truly in awe of the culture. They had toilets that flushed, water that was purified, food that didn’t make me sick. The people were warm and friendly. I met many of her Mexican friends. Catrina’s host family became instant family to me. And there was Catrina communicating fluently with everyone. I was very proud of her.

Catrina and Mario got married last month at the Tucson courthouse. They are planning a bigger wedding in Cuernavaca. Catrina, who majored in business and minored in Spanish in college, just got a job with Raytheon Missile Systems. Mario is training for the next level of being a computer networks specialist. Meanwhile, Mario is beginning the complicated procedures for applying for a work permit. It is a lengthy and expensive process.

SEEING THINGS DIFFERENTLY

My views about Mexicans and immigrants have changed. I know that I am looking at it much different than I would have two years ago. Part of it was my visit to Mexico, which I enjoyed. Now I hope Catrina and Mario will move there so I can visit again. Part of it is Catrina, and how later I learned she was stereotyped by Mexicans in Mexico. "You come from where they kill Mexicans crossing the border," they told her. Mario, part of whose family immigrated to Mexico from Italy, says he feels the Mexican illegal immigrants coming here make it harder for him to immigrate legally and give Mexicans a bad name.

I know Americans are different colors, speak different languages and think differently about things. I know my grandchildren will be multicultural, and so will America as people intermarry with other cultures. I look at Catrina’s marriage as a positive experience from which I can learn about another culture. Here I am, 52 years old, and maybe finally, starting to break out of the white sandwich bread mold.


Beth Pearson is a teacher in the
Tucson Unified School District.